Monday, December 14, 2009

The sun shines again

It's finally warming up into the 40's again. Feels like a heat wave compared to the frigid cold we were having. The goats are spending their nights back outside in their own little shelter.

Spent the weekend delivering Christmas presents to friends and family. I always make tins full of fudge and cookies to give out for the holidays. It's great fun and I think everyone should have fudge for Christmas. It's one of the things I can give when money is tight.

Still dreaming of big old farmhouses, but now I'm thinking of New Mexico landscapes. Do the two go together? The lots are still for sale next to our property here, and I wonder about buying one or more to add to our homestead. We should research what that would take. So many dreams, so little money.

My darling teenage girl is thinking about going into the Job Corps. Montana. So far away. I think it may be a positive step for her, if she can get in. A planned out future and goals to work for, so when she finishes she will be successful and self-sufficient, and possibly happy. It may turn into a very good thing and a wonderful opportunity.

And I am trying so hard to get back into an exercise routine. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Today was a good day and I did my Wii yoga and strength training and ran for twenty minutes, which is about four miles in Wii distance. Not bad. I sure feel better both physically and emotionally when I exercise. I also am trying to write in my journal on a more frequent basis, and although I'm not writing anything significant or particularly artistic, at least I am writing again. Perhaps one day I will begin to write poetry again.

I lost a friend a while back and that weighs heavy on my heart sometimes. He was a phenominal poet, an artist, a kind soul, a colleague in the local art cause, and a beautiful person. He took his own life and I feel a lot of pain over that. He was one of the few in my city who gave local, unknown artists shows and he helped me raise funds and have an art show when I was publishing my local art magazine. Overall, he was a good guy and I will miss him horribly. I'm sorry he decided to leave, but I hope things are better for him wherever he has gone.

Mostly I still just try to get through each day, wondering how to stay present in times that are so tough, both financially and emotionally. One second at a time.