Crazy dizzy head, shooting pains. I dream of blonde boys from so long ago and then it falls back into NM dreams. Listen to NIN. Got to be one of the best bands ever. With Teeth one of the best albums. And I find myself wanting to go back...hiding in the trees, like in Portland...an attempted escape from myself that failed. There I was and here I am.
I have forgotten the long journey that got me to this place. I have pushed aside the love in search of ego dreams. I have lost a soul mate to the Universe again and again. He wears a different face. He is the artist. He is the philosopher and a poet, and a student of spirituality. He is my mirror. He is me. He has the darkest eyes that reflect myself back again. And I run from him as he runs from me, but we are on the same plane and though we may never meet again, we cross paths again and again, because we are one, always together, living in the rippled illusion of the broken frame.
I have forgotten myself. Even death can not tear apart those united. Nor can time or space. It is all an illusion as I live here now in this physical place, becoming my ego self and forgetting once again. Nothing matters. I float on the love of the Universe, listening to the songs I sing to myself, my spirit sings to me. I miss him. And I miss him. I miss her, lost friend. And I miss him again. Time passes and I grow old in this body but my mind is ever young, searching for those who came before, hoping for some recognition as souls unite again.
